Hallucifer Rising
by milksfavourite
Summary: Sam starts hallucinating again and Dean doesn't know what to do. *This may become a series, if it gets enough response*
1. Chapter 1

Sam fell to his knees, clutching his head in his hands. A helpless moan of pain escaped his lips. Dean turned to his brother, falling to his knees beside him.

"Sammy, you okay?" Dean asked. "Are you seeing Lucifer again?"

Sam grunted his confirmation. Dean grabbed his brother's face, forcing him to look at him. "Sammy, it's not real. This is real." He shook Sam's face. "This is real. I'm real."

Lucifer was laughing at Sam; taunting him. "Oh, what's the matter, Sam? Don't you want to talk to me? I'm hurt."

Dean pulled Sam in, getting right in his face. "Sam. Listen to me! This is real, what's here now is real. He grabbed Sam's hand, the one he'd cut open and Dean had been the one to stitch up. Dean dug his fingers into the stitches causing Sam to cry out in pain. Dean winced as if the pain was his own but he needed Sam to know what was real. "Feel this pain? That's what's real."

Sam looked up, squinting as he tried to focus on his brother but Lucifer was making it impossible. He was now dancing around the brothers, clutching at each other, and singing. Loudly. Sam began to sob, the frustration and terror becoming too much. Dean grabbed Sam's face in both hands and kissed him. The angle was wrong and their teeth clacked together but it was the most perfect kiss. Sam gasped, Lucifer vanishing in a cry of shock. Sam pulled his brother closer, never wanting to let go. This was real. Dean was real and safe. They were real. They real and together and nothing could hurt them as long as they were together.


	2. Chapter 2

_Okay, First things first. THANK YOU~ to everyone who reviewed and such. I send you all a basket of internet hugs and cupcakes. I hope things go as well with this chapter as they did with the last because I've been a little stuck on where to pick things up from. In case you can't tell, I've elected to pick up at the__ motel after the boys got back. So, I like this chapter and I enjoyed writing it, but if you disagree let me know and I'll try and fix it. I'm really sorry if it's not as good as you were expecting but yeah. I'll see what I can do about more kisses and such in the next chapter if you like. If that's what you want, tell me. 'Cause otherwise I'll keep procrastinating with angst. Reviews are love. I mean really. I'd never be able to keep writing and posting with you guys._

Dean held Sam up against himself, fishing in one pocket for the motel key. He managed to juggle it to the door and let them in. Sam immediately staggered to the bed, collapsing in an ungraceful heap. He was exhausted. Dean watched his brother, unable to say or do anything. Both of them had, after the kiss, been too long in suffering to care much, but now, here in the motel, Dean had to face what he'd done. He'd kissed his brother. His baby brother who trusted Dean to take care of him and in a moment of fear and weakness, Dean had betrayed everything he was as a brother. In his distress Dean had forgotten the desperation and strength with Sam had clung to him.

Sam buried his face in the pillows, not sleeping yet, but unable to face Dean. He couldn't deal with it. Any of it. He didn't want to look at Dean. Didn't want to face the fact that when, in the heat of the moment, his brother kissed him, he nearly whimpered like a little puppy and clung to his brother like a limpet. But then, he wasn't sure if he could live without it again. Living without that closeness that they had shared for the briefest of minutes seemed impossible. Sam had forgotten. Dean didn't _have _to kiss him, because Dean knew that the pain worked. Dean had kissed Sam because he wanted to.

Dean showered perfunctorily, not letting himself dwell on anything.

Sam stripped to his boxers and climbed into bed, willing sleep to come on fast.

When Dean came out, Sam pretended to be asleep.

When Dean whispered a cracked, "Night, Sammy," to the darkness, he pretended not to hear Sam's quiet sob.

And, as always, both of them pretended they weren't broken.


End file.
